Living, Breathing Memories

“When you look back on times we had
I hope you smile
And know that through the good and through the bad
I was on your side when nobody could hold us down
We claimed the brightest star
And we, we came so far
And no they won't forget”

-Carrie Underwood “Whenever you remember”

Today I want to talk about them:

The Group, as in “Let’s get The Group together and go to the movies.” These people are the people I grew up with- the people that I turned to for help and love and support. These are the people I went from innocent to adult with. From naïve to wise. These people taught me lessons I will never forget: loyalty, compassion, forgiveness, honesty, support and love. This blog is about them

I remember when my friends and I used to hang out every afternoon under the huge tree in the Park. We once even had pizza delivered there! We use to have rock wars, and roll down the hill. How whenever it rained we tried to hide under the tree and when that didn’t work we ran over to the play structure.

I remember when I dyed my hair platinum blonde after my grandpa passed, and they all laughed at me (about the hair). I know that sounds terrible, but in all fairness to them the color was atrocious. I remember when everyone laughed at us for “only dating within our circle” which I now see was really true.

I remember when we all went swimming, all of us girls self conscious in our swim suits, and the boys all smiles and laughter in their trunks.  How we dunked each other, and how even though I was scared out of my mind I jumped off the diving board just because I didn’t want them to think I was weak.

And even though I swore I didn’t remember- I remember when someone grabbed onto someone else’s basketball shorts and de-pantsed them on accident. That was an awkward turtle moment if ever there was one. Shh don’t tell- I doubt the someone else reads this!

I remember the support I got from those friends. The girl I’d known since I was 9, who was my closest friend for 6 years. The person who stuck with me through all my drama queen moments, and really taught me what it meant to be a friend. The person I always turned to.

I remember the curly haired girl I ignored because my other friends thought she wasn’t cool. The girl I decided to be friends with despite them, who became my sister. The one who held me up when I felt like I would fall. Who kept telling me to forget about my fear of heights and reach for the stars. The same girl who I woke up by singing Rascal Flatts and attacking her with stuffed animals. The same girl I wouldn’t ignore for the world.



I remember the first day of Leadership when I got paired with this funny girl with glasses. I remember that when we became friends we were either the very best of friends or we really weren’t friends at all. Sure we fought, but when we weren’t fighting we were always at each others houses. Always together, watching Empire Records or Hackers (my two favorite movies, writing notes to each other, or just listening to music. She was the girl whose family took me in, who taught me everything they could, who made me want to be more.

They are the two girls who mean the most to me. Who I call with exciting news and who I miss terribly when they head back to school. These are my sisters, not by blood, but by everything else. The sisters that matter to me (Including Ashley of course).

I remember the shortest of our little “Family”. The girl we called “Ditzy” for years, and wrote her off as just that. I’ve always felt terrible for that. The girl who changed her hair color as many times as her clothes. Who got apple juice spilled on her (by a certain Strawberry) every time she wore a specific Coke shirt.

I remember the boys who started out like brothers and then became more than that. The two boys I told everything to, that I stayed up for hours talking to. The two boys who stuck by me when I felt my world falling in around me.  The two boys who know everything there is to know about me. The boys who sat through our fantasy triggering romance movies as long as we watched Lords of Dogtown with them. The boys who made me laugh when I wanted to bury myself in a hole. These are the boys who supported me when I was positive I wasn’t going anywhere.

HAHA I remember I smashed this bubble and it got everywhere! Sorry Timmy

Lazy!

(Note: These were also the two boys who got me hooked on Rockstar and Mountain Dew. I’m just saying. )

I remember the day that Josh walked into the pool with his cell phone still in his shorts (Silly). I remember when I told Tim a particularly shocking secret and he nearly broke his phone in half. I remember the days that I realized I loved them (separately). The days that I realized I was willing to take a chance on that love.

You know there are still days when I’m upset that I pick up the phone, dial it, and hang it up again because I know that our lives are so much different now that I don’t think you’d want to hear from me. That’s okay, but I still wish I could talk to you.

I remember these people who have meant so much to me in my life (a few of which I still talk to on a regular basis). I also remember I’ve lost every single one of them at least once in our friendship. When you lose a great friend you mourn their loss no matter what happened. You feel their loss in your bones and you carry it every day.

I miss these people. I miss the silly times. I’m so proud of everyone for going after what they want, but I miss talking to them. I miss being surrounded by the people who know me the best. If I could only have a one or two of them back I know who I’d choose. It would be hard, but there are some people that I still miss every single day. The proud few that wormed their way into my heart so completely that I wish they were still talking to me. I hope you realize how much I miss you.

This is some random thoughts of the night as I remember how my life once was. Here’s my advice: You know you have a true friend if even after months of not talking you still pick up the phone to call them about exciting news.

Kristen