A few years ago I used to watch the show Engaged and Underage and I couldn’t believe that people would get engaged so young. I couldn’t believe that people thought that they were ready to get married at 18. But even though I didn’t think it was a good idea, I was hooked onto that show. The show ended, and I began wondering if my thoughts were clouded by what I’d always been told- that married is for adults, and as a result my thoughts about being an adult changed as well. To me if you’re old enough to move out, you’re old enough to get married. Which leads me to my point in this post.
I’m Engaged! For those of you that know us you probably aren’t that shocked since we’ve been practically connected at the hip for years, but for those of you who don’t let me give you some history.
Josh and I went to middle school together, even though we never officially met as anything more than “Hey, this is Josh.” So we went our separate ways until freshman year of high school. Josh’s best friend Tim was dating my best friend Meghan, and therefore we were kind of forced together. Soon though, we became friends with each other (and everyone else) and became “the group.” A tight knit, inseparable group.
We started to talk a little more openly to each other, and just clicked. By the end of sophomore year we were always together. All throughout junior year we talked all the time, and began our tradition of walking home together (since we both lived close enough to walk, and lived in the same direction. We would sit at the corner of my cul-de-sac and talk for so long every afternoon. We told each other everything, and he never judged me for anything. After the loss of a once good friend at the end of junior year, (and then my uncle later) Josh became my rock. He knew all of my secrets, and I knew all of his (even the dorky ones). We were together a lot, I was even invited to go to a concert with his family (below).
The day finally came where we just decided what the hell, why not? Unfortunately, the timing was wrong and I left to visit family for a month and when I came back I made the mistake of breaking it off. However, throughout senior year Josh and I remained friends and even tried to get back together a few times that didn’t work out, but we were always there for each other: when he had relationship problems, I was there giving advice. When I got my wisdom teeth out he stayed all night to make sure I wasn't lonely.
The night my wisdom teeth were removed
Throughout senior year Josh had been talking to recruiters on his own and finally decided to join the Army. I was more than shocked. In fact the second he told me, I started bawling. All I could think of was guns, and wars, and the fact that I didn’t want him to go, but I knew that the one thing I always gave him was my support. So I told him the truth: that I was terrified, but I was so proud of him for signing up even though he wasn't sure how he would do.
Then came May 31st. Prom Night. Josh and I went with other people, and in fact barely saw each other (we were fighting). But my night was not as pleasant as I had hoped I spent the majority of Prom bawling my eyes out. But the second I was upset the only thought in my head was “I need my best friend. I have to find Josh.” And even though were fighting the second he saw me he opened his arms to me. I spent the night crying in my best friend’s arms whispering how sorry I was about our fight. And even though it should have been a disaster I couldn’t help but feel happy and safe as I left prom in a limo full of my friends with my best friend finally talking to me again.
For the next few weeks we got through Graduation, and final concerts, and the end of an era together. I remember Senior Assembly when Josh and Tim won Best Friends, and I clapped and cheered, just like I was the loudest cheer when Josh got his cord for the Armed Forces, and he was the loudest when I got my FAME cord, and when I won Next American Idol. We spent the Senior BBQ together, me freezing in my little Graduation Dress, and him hanging out in a t-shirt and jeans.
Two weeks later we were an item. Simple as that J we made it official after his Graduation Party. Josh was there when I got severely ill, and I was there the night he left for Basic. I spent months writing letters every night, and waiting by the phone every Sunday (my first call didn’t happen until 6 weeks after he left). Then came the day when I decided to (somewhat spontaneaously) move to Maryland. I was from there and Josh was going to be 3000 miles away from family all by himself and that wasn’t something I could handle. So I bought a plane ticket to South Carolina, and September 15th I told him I was there to stay.
On October 9, 2010 Josh left Ft Meade on his first weekend pass (which was on Columbus Day). Little did I know what he had in store. We were laying on the couch just relaxing before skyping Stephanie Owskey, and he said he had something for me. He went to his bag and pulled a little white box out. He said that he loved me and that he didn’t want to be without me and the next thing I know we were holding our breath hoping the ring fit. J We were all smiles and happiness, and I thought I would explode from joy. The proposal was sweet, simple and to the point and it was absolutely perfect.
As corny as it is, I’ve never had anyone who gets me the way that he does and supports me in whatever I choose, without fail. He reminds me to look on the positive and I remind him to look at the practical. We aren’t perfect, and to be honest, if we were it wouldn’t be the same. I love him for every imperfection that he has and he loves me for every imperfection that I do. And even though we’ll fight, and have our issues I don’t care. I love him and I think I always have.
Josh is crazy, spunky, and spontaneous. He’s happy, and positive, and he sees the beauty in the world around him. He’s respectful, and loving, and he drives me nuts in the good ways and the bad. He changed after Basic: he’s stronger, more independent, and he’s ready and willing to step up for what he wants. But no matter what he’s the same guy that I loved in Oregon, just in ACU’s. He's still the biggest dork I know, that is so obsessed with music that it's not funny. Still the same guy who loves to buy clothes, and to meet new people. He makes me smile even when I'm stressed, and he makes me laugh even when we're talking about strained subjects. He reminds me that he loves me everyday, not because he has to, but because he actually means it. He makes me strive to be a better person,a nd to make our life together so much better. He’s my hero, and my best friend and there’s no way I want to live my life without him.
So that all those years ago when I would watch Engaged and Underage I scoffed because I thought that at 18 you don’t know what you want. But I’d never have thought that at 18 I’d know not only exactly what I want, but what steps I need to take to get there. I may be 18, but I’m nothing if not strategic and smart, and I know what the life of an Army wife requires. I know that we may struggle, but as long as we love each other we can make it.
*Sorry for all the mushy stuff, but my blog needed a little bit of it haha*
So, Josh and I are engaged, and we are happier than ever. To finish this post, I’m putting a term that we found to fit perfectly. It means “My soul friend.”
Mo Anam Cara,
Kristen
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